Through working with Nick we have become a closer family and have a better understanding of our child’s issues.
This means a Family Therapist will see one member’s struggles as a symptom of the whole family system. Often what seems to be a problem for a child or partner can turn out to be the symptom of other issues, so I help you all to make changes. This is why it is also called systemic psychotherapy.
About me
My qualifications
I am a qualified Family Therapist and registered with the UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) and the Association of Family Therapy and Systemic Practice (AFT).
My background includes over 30 years as a consultant working across the world specialising in organisational change, leadership coaching, corporate diplomacy, conflict, relationship management, and mediation.
During my time at the Tavistock Consulting Service, I became intrigued by the similarities between organisations and families. I then completed a Masters in Family Therapy at the Tavistock Clinic and UEL.
My practice is now a blend of organisational and therapy work, and I particularly enjoy supporting Family Businesses.
Who I've worked with
I have worked in a number of NHS Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) supporting children and parents facing an extensive range of challenges.
I have also worked in specialist clinics including Action for Autism in New Delhi, India, and within the NHS focusing on neuro-developmental issues and eating disorders. These include the South West London & St George’s Mental Health NHS Trust Eating Disorder Service; the Priory, Roehampton – Eating Disorders; and the West London Mental Health NHS Trust Neuro-developmental team, and as Therapy Lead at Collingham Child and Family Centre (an inpatient service for children).
I am currently practising at The Soke, an Interim School Counsellor, a Visiting Lecturer for the Tavistock Clinic, and I have a private practice.
About me
My qualifications
I am a qualified Family Therapist and registered with the UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) and the Association of Family Therapy and Systemic Practice (AFT).
My background includes over 30 years as a consultant working across the world specialising in organisational change, leadership coaching, corporate diplomacy, conflict, relationship management, and mediation.
During my time at the Tavistock Consulting Service, I became intrigued by the similarities between organisations and families. I then completed a Masters in Family Therapy at the Tavistock Clinic and UEL.
My practice is now a blend of organisational and therapy work, and I particularly enjoy supporting Family Businesses.
Who I've worked with
I have worked in a number of NHS Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) supporting children and parents facing an extensive range of challenges.
I have also worked in specialist clinics including Action for Autism in New Delhi, India, and within the NHS focusing on neuro-developmental issues and eating disorders. These include the South West London & St George’s Mental Health NHS Trust Eating Disorder Service; the Priory, Roehampton – Eating Disorders; and the West London Mental Health NHS Trust Neuro-developmental team, and as Therapy Lead at Collingham Child and Family Centre (an inpatient service for children).
I am currently practising at The Soke, an Interim School Counsellor, a Visiting Lecturer for the Tavistock Clinic, and I have a private practice.
How I can help
I work with families, couples and individuals, both together and separately as needed. I know that it can be daunting at first when you bring your dilemmas and fears to a stranger, but I also know that in many ways it is even harder to talk to those who really matter and might worry about you. Because of this I usually begin by talking about how we can make it feel safe to begin conversations that you might be scared cannot be ‘put back in the bottle’ once said. Types of issues I can help you with include:
Mediation &
Conflict
Sometimes family relationships breakdown to the point where it feels irretrievable. I can help both ‘sides’ work on repairing the relationship, or more typically, help you think about your approach to reconciliation.
Family
Communication
When families come to me wanting help with communication it can mean that trust has gone missing. That can be difficult to nurture but I help families to work through this. Sometimes these can feel complex to the family and they might not know where to start. Parents can also find themselves unsure about when to be worried and when to be patient, supportive and trust that their children’s challenges will resolve themselves. Other parents want help to become better skilled at helping their child’s emotional development.
Relationship
Difficulties
I work with sibling relationships and parent/couple relationships, in fact all types of relationships within the family!
Anxiety &
Self Harm
Whilst individual treatment with CBT might be the best approach for helping a young person who is suffering with anxiety or using self-harm to help them cope, I know that parents often feel they are out of their depth. I can help you with strategies and practice for how you might communicate with your child in the most helpful way.
Autistic Spectrum
Disorder
I have helped many families with their approach to, and support of, their child post-diagnosis.
Eating
Disorders
I am experienced in helping young people and their families overcome eating disorders, and helping adolescents explore control over their lives when it feels to them that they are powerless.
Gender
Identity
For young people who are clear that their gender at birth is not who they know they are, negotiating the feelings and thoughts within their family can be very difficult. In addition they may feel that they are facing resistance from the medical community in their quest for change. Meanwhile, many parents will be thinking that this is all going too fast, should they be ‘pushing back’ against their child’s wishes? Is this just a phase? Is it something about the way they have parented? I can help families and young people think this through so that all perspectives can be aired.
How I can help
I work with families, couples and individuals, both together and separately as needed. I know that it can be daunting at first when you bring your dilemmas and fears to a stranger, but I also know that in many ways it is even harder to talk to those who really matter and might worry about you. Because of this I usually begin by talking about how we can make it feel safe to begin conversations that you might be scared cannot be ‘put back in the bottle’ once said. Types of issues I can help you with include:
Mediation &
Conflict
Sometimes family relationships breakdown to the point where it feels irretrievable. I can help both ‘sides’ work on repairing the relationship, or more typically, help you think about your approach to reconciliation.
Communication
When families come to me wanting help with communication it can mean that trust has gone missing. That can be difficult to nurture but I help families to work through this. Sometimes these can feel complex to the family and they might not know where to start. Parents can also find themselves unsure about when to be worried and when to be patient, supportive and trust that their children’s challenges will resolve themselves. Other parents want help to become better skilled at helping their child’s emotional development.
Relationship
Difficulties
I work with sibling relationships and parent/couple relationships, in fact all types of relationships within the family!
Anxiety &
Self Harm
Whilst individual treatment with CBT might be the best approach for helping a young person who is suffering with anxiety or using self-harm to help them cope, I know that parents often feel they are out of their depth. I can help you with strategies and practice for how you might communicate with your child in the most helpful way.
Autistic Spectrum
Disorder
I have helped many families with their approach to, and support of, their child post-diagnosis.
Eating
Disorders
I am experienced in helping young people and their families overcome eating disorders, and helping adolescents explore control over their lives when it feels to them that they are powerless.
Gender
Identity
For young people who are clear that their gender at birth is not who they know they are, negotiating the feelings and thoughts within their family can be very difficult. In addition they may well feel that they are facing resistance from the medical community in their quest for change. Meanwhile, many parents will be thinking that this is all going too fast, should they be ‘pushing back’ against their child’s wishes? Is this just a phase? Is it something about the way they have parented? I can help families and young people think this through so that all perspectives can be aired.
How I can help
I work with families, couples and individuals, both together and separately as needed. I know that it can be daunting at first when you bring your dilemmas and fears to a stranger, but I also know that in many ways it is even harder to talk to those who really matter and might worry about you. Because of this I usually begin by talking about how we can make it feel safe to begin conversations that you might be scared cannot be ‘put back in the bottle’ once said. Types of issues I can help you with include:
Mediation &
Conflict
Sometimes family relationships breakdown to the point where it feels irretrievable. I can help both ‘sides’ work on repairing the relationship, or more typically, help you think about your approach to reconciliation.
Family
Communication
When families come to me wanting help with communication it can mean that trust has gone missing. That can be difficult to nurture but I help families to work through this. Sometimes these can feel complex to the family and they might not know where to start. Parents can also find themselves unsure about when to be worried and when to be patient, supportive and trust that their children’s challenges will resolve themselves. Other parents want help to become better skilled at helping their child’s emotional development.
Relationship
Difficulties
I work with sibling relationships and parent/couple relationships, in fact all types of relationships within the family!
Anxiety &
Self Harm
Whilst individual treatment with CBT might be the best approach for helping a young person who is suffering with anxiety or using self-harm to help them cope, I know that parents often feel they are out of their depth. I can help you with strategies and practice for how you might communicate with your child in the most helpful way.
Autistic Spectrum
Disorder
I have helped many families with their approach to, and support of, their child post-diagnosis.
Eating
Disorders
I am experienced in helping young people and their families overcome eating disorders, and helping adolescents explore control over their lives when it feels to them that they are powerless.
Gender
Identity
For young people who are clear that their gender at birth is not who they know they are, negotiating the feelings and thoughts within their family can be very difficult. In addition they may well feel that they are facing resistance from the medical community in their quest for change. Meanwhile, many parents will be thinking that this is all going too fast, should they be ‘pushing back’ against their child’s wishes? Is this just a phase? Is it something about the way they have parented? I can help families and young people think this through so that all perspectives can be aired.
Nick was very approachable and rapidly showed that he understood us and our problems.
Typical cases
Tom*
Ten year old Tom had poor attention and angry outbursts both at home and at school. His parents approached Nick to help with his behaviour and conduct. At an initial session with the whole family it emerged that his parents had different views on how to manage him and difficulty communicating with each other. Working with Tom’s parents enabled them to see how this was affecting his sense of security and the mixed messages he was getting. Changing their relationship had a positive impact on Tom.
Jen & Adrian*
Whilst Jen and Adrian came looking for ideas and explanations for their daughter’s anxiety, I gently helped them explore how this might be connected with their different parenting styles and the pattern of their own relationship. Adrian, like many men, was extremely wary of expressing his thoughts as he was afraid that once out they could not be ‘unsaid’. We worked together to ensure that the sessions felt safe enough to allow him to take some risks. Their daughter’s worries were actually partly about what she imagined was going on in some of her parents many silences at home.
*Names have been changed and details are from typical cases and not specific to any of my client’s individual circumstances.
Recommended Resources
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FAMILY THERAPY INSIGHTS: Helping parents navigate family relationships & mental health challenges
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Contact
I am based in Barnes, South West London and see private patients in Central and South West London. I am also available for consultation via phone or video conferencing. Click here to email meOr call 07973 408054Contact
I am based in Barnes, South West London and see private patients in Central and South West London. I am also available for consultation via phone or video conferencing.